Monday, March 21, 2011

Melodrama Mondays - A Phone in the Refrigerator

Today, I put my phone in the refrigerator. Yes, it was that kind of day. I got fussed out by more people than I can name, including one right at the last minute of the day, and THEN on our way home, my husband and I and the car in front of us both got passed on a double yellow line on a curvy, hilly road. I'd just like to know what's so dang important that you have to take your life, my life, my husband's life, and the lives of all the passengers of an SUV into your own stupid hands? But whatever.

Back to the phone story.

We were getting ready for dinner, and I grabbed a bottle of...something that needed to be put in the fridge (how the heck am I supposed to remember exactly what it was? Remember, I'm the girl who puts her phone in the refrigerator)...and put it in the pantry cabinet, and my phone in the fridge. Now, this kind of thing has happened to me before believe it or not. I sometimes transform into a whirlwind of cleaning/straightening up magical-ness and may lose sight of what goes where in my hurry to get it all done. This happens a lot when we bring home groceries.

The putting away of groceries is nearly an athletic event for me. It starts with getting the bags out of the car. I carry as many as humanly possible without cutting off the circulation to my hands from the sheer weight of it all. I hate making more than one trip. Hate it. So I grab as many bags as possible, as does the hubby, and we make the trek up the garage stairs into the kitchen. By the time I get to the top of the stairs, I won't lie, I feel like I've run a marathon. Heavy breathing and wheezing ensues. A thin film of sweat has broken out on my forehead, but my task isn't near complete. After neatly carelessly dropping the grocery bags on the kitchen table in a heap, I race to begin unloading them. Curse the bag boy for his poor organizational skills (dry goods and meat in the same bag, really?!)! Everything is typically in jumbled order and disarray, so I just start grabbing. Yes, sometimes the milk ends up in the pantry, or the mac-n-cheese will somehow find its way into the fridge, but in the end, everything gets straightened out and finds its place. 

Which is just what happened to my phone tonight. As we were bringing everything into the living room to eat, because the table in the kitchen is solely for looks, I remembered that I still needed to fix our lemonade. I went back in, opened up the fridge, and ta-da! There my phone sat. For a moment, I imagine I was a little puzzled but that only lasted a moment. Jeremy trailed into the kitchen as I was lifting out the lemonade pitcher. "Do we have everything?"

I got down two glasses and filled them with ice. "Yep, everything but my phone. Can you grab it out of the fridge?"

Poor Jeremy. He just stood there looking at me. I imagine he wonders what the heck he's gotten himself into...a lot. I assured him I had a  perfectly good reason for keeping my phone in the fridge. He raised an eyebrow at me. "Oh really? And what was that?"

With as straight of a face as I could muster, I replied, "Because the bacon needed to make a call."

Yeah, I'm corny. We're two corny kids in corny love. 

Post Script - As I was writing this, my neighbor had their car radio turned up so loud that our house was shaking. I had to fight the uncontrollable urge to open my screen door and yell out "Hey, you crazy kids! Turn your damn music down!" I am officially old. 



  1. I also HATE making more than one grocery-bringing-in trip from the car. Does this makes us lazy...? This totally doesn't make us lazy... right? LOL

    Great post! Thoroughly enjoyed it :)


  2. *howlng* The bacon needed to make a call. Makes sense to me. Thanks for the laugh.

  3. I second, the second on bringing all the bags in at once!! Loved your post...hate your day was crappy, but there were some bright spots, like when I came to see you!!LOL

    "The Librarian"

  4. purple fingers from heavy grocery bags? Yup...I do that. I've also put a gallon of milk in the cabinet and then wondered where the heck I put the milk. My husband once put the ice cream in the fridge... no one is immune.
    This is a very funny post!

  5. Ladies, let's invent something that would help carry grocery bags into the house. I bet we could make millions!

  6. Haha! I thought I was the only one using grocery bags as my weights workout for the day. And the tidying whirlwind is the only cleaning that gets done most of the time at our house. Better than nothing...even if the phone ends up in the fridge.

    Thanks for joining my blog :)


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