Monday, April 11, 2011

Melodrama Mondays - The Iron Versus Me

Something occurred to me last night as I was ironing my husband's shirts for another work week. I had actually ironed twice within the last month or so. Twice! A miracle! I yelled this fact to Jeremy, who was in the kitchen preparing our gourmet dinner of sautéed onions with polska kielbasa and our favorite: out of the box Mac 'n Cheese.

"You must love me a lot" was his reply. And I do, because I hate ironing. I hate ironing like I hate people who have pets and don't spend time with them. I hate ironing like I hate corrupt politicians and nasty English peas. I. Hate. Ironing. I do everything in my power to avoid ironing at all costs. At any cost. I specifically buy clothes that are iron-proof, i.e. silky fabrics which somehow dry with no wrinkles. These blouses and dresses are my saviour. They keep me away from the dreaded iron and ironing board with ease, and I love them for it.

Jeremy's clothes don't get by as easily without ironing. For some reason they don't make a lot of men's clothes in that rayon/whatever blend that makes my shirts so fundamentally fabulous. Guess it's not a very "masculine" kind of fabric. Whatever. In an effort to avoid having to iron Jeremy's clothes, I hang up as much as possible. OR I hop on the dryer as SOON as it's done so I can whip out his pants and shirts before they have a chance to wrinkle up. Trust me, I'm the queen of avoiding the iron.
Evil Iron of Doom
Unfortunately, last night, the iron and I had to meet again. The shirt that I needed to wear for an event at work today was wadded up in the bottom of one of my dresser drawers. Yesterday afternoon, I rummaged through the drawers and pulled it out. I shook it thinking that somehow, miraculously, the shaking motion would make all of those set-in, old-as-hell wrinkles just magically disappear. Yeah, not so much. I would have to face my old nemesis.

Whenever I do have to iron, I try to make it as productive an ironing session as possible so that I won't have to iron again for awhile. I pulled out some of Jeremy's shirts that weren't saved from the dryer in time to avoid wrinkling. I ironed. And ironed. And ironed some more. I ironed THREE whole shirts. I hated every minute of it.

But anyway, back to loving Jeremy. The last time I ironed within the last month was for his recent job interview. I spent what seemed like hours getting his shirt and pants perfectly creased and crisp. I was so proud of his interview outfit that I was tempted to take a picture (not of it on him but on the hangers looking perfectly unwrinkled), but I managed to refrain. That might have been a little weird.

To be perfectly honest, I would probably never iron if it weren't for Jeremy (even though the rare occasion does come up when I need to iron for myself). I don't want to be sappy, because I hate sappy, but I do a lot of things (like: eat Subway, watch hours worth of video game-playing, listen to Japanese rock music) just because I love Jeremy. So I suppose I should add ironing to that list, too. But all of it is worth it, because he's a pretty dorky loveable dorkily loveable great guy, and I'm so thankful that:

1) We met on the internet.
2) He moved across the country for me, from California to Georgia with little more than a picture of me to go by.
3) We got married. (Some stuff happened in between these of course but that's the gist of it.)

All of that trumps ironing any day of the week. Even on Mondays.

PS - Do any of you actually enjoy ironing? If so, can I mail my wrinkled clothes to you?

PPS - Because I feel that I cannot truly express to you in words how much I hate ironing, I will leave you with this picture. When I iron, I similarly hold the back of my hand to my face in complete exasperation. It is a pitiful thing indeed.
Woe is us all.


  1. Katie, you are a peach...and not just because you're from Georgia. I'm so glad I followed you!

    I hate ironing so much that I have actually washed the clothes again just to avoid it. Think about it: put all the stuff that needs to be ironed right back into the washer, let it swish around, pop it into the dryer and VOILA! Ironing cleverly avoided yet again!

  2. I'm with Dweej, I have done the same thing.
    When we moved into our new house we have a washer with a steamer, I have tossed things in there.
    I have also about a jug of wrinkle release and spray the hell out of the shirt when husband is wearing it.
    Ironing is evil!

  3. Ironing. Synonym: Ugh, Awful, Blergh, Evil ;-)

  4. Haha, I am lucky that I dont have to iron that much. I had an ex boyfriend that needed his ironing done all the freakin' time. Yeah, that didn't last long. You are such a good wifey for ironing though. And it is pretty nice that he appreciates it :)

  5. Laughing here because I have one of those state-of-the-art irons that does everything but iron by itself.

    It's stored in its box in one of my linen closets where I admire it, now and then and quickly close the door. What does that tell you??

    The last time I ironed anything I used my BIG fat curling iron and it made the job painless, almost. I touched up a collar on a shirt but burned my hand in the process; me, a pro hair stylist. Dayum!

    Have a lovely, iron-free Tuesday!


  6. I too hate ironing... passionately! I was in Target the other day though and I saw a pink iron - which made me for a split second think "I NEED THAT!" because anytime I see anything in pink I need it... It's a horrible habit/obsession of mine. It can be something I'll never use (like an iron) and I'll buy it just because it's pink. Same thing with zebra stripes. But I digress... I paused for a moment, picked it up... Examined it and it's pink cuteness and then set it right back down. Because I will iron for NO ONE. Not even with a cute pink iron. haha!

    Anywho... I gave you an award today lovely!

  7. Effing iron? Are you kidding me? I married my husband because he sends his fancy shirts out to be laundered and pressed...and because i love him.

  8. I believe we are twins....

    I would have yelled out to my Hubs as well just to inform him of the 2nd time of ironing. I also despise ironing. My hubs didnt even know I was capable of it til this past weekend. The things you get to learn about your spounces through life. :)

    And now my fam. is home so I'll leave ya with this...Happy Tuesday!!!

  9. Ironing is awful. I'm a lover of Downy wrinkle releaser...which, they DON'T have in Ireland! I had to create my own with fabric softener and water. Works pretty good lol.

  10. Haha, I hate ironing, corrupt politicians (or all of them), people who neglect their pets, and I'm allergic to nasty little peas, so I feel your pain! I have a steamer and honestly I only pulled my iron out when my dad was visiting me in Feb. I don't know what I'd do without my steamer!! I got it at Tuesday Morning for like $20 or something and it was the best $20 I've spent in a while!

  11. @Dweej: I've done the same thing!!! Oh, my gosh, I totally have. I hate to do that, but I do it ALL the time. I'm so glad to know someone else does, too. Oh, and I'm glad I found your blog, too. :) Can't wait to catch up on the whole thing!

    @Bernie: Amen! For some reason, I've never tried wrinkle release. How crazy is that?! You've reminded me that I need to though.

    @Samantha: Truer words were never spoken :)

    @Tex: Ha! I would've dumped that guy, too...I mean, ironing is a deal breaker. Oh, and the hubby better damn well appreciate it, or he's going to get an earful from me.

    @Patty: Hehe! I love it. That's really all an iron is good for anyway, sitting on a shelf and looking pretty.

    @Heather: Glad you came to your senses about the iron. Sounds like me. I usually can't resist stuff that I'm obsessed with, like let's say anything with an owl on it. But honestly, do I really need a toilet seat with an owl on it?! Yeah, not so much :) Thanks for the award, friend!

    @No. 7: I would've listed those reasons in that very same order. A man who doesn't require you to iron for him is a good man indeed.

    @Toni:'s so nice to hear I'm not the only person who barely ever irons. Makes me feel validated. :)

    @Lesley: But isn't Ireland a wonderful place anyway? I want to visit SO bad. Even if they don't have wrinkle releaser... :)

    @Modern Southerner: I'm going to have to look into getting a steamer. It sounds wonderful. Our Tuesday Morning just went out of business :( I'm going to miss it!

  12. YOU TOTALLY NEED A TOILET SEAT WITH AN OWL ON IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Hi, my name is Heather & I'm an enabler.


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