Sunday, May 15, 2011

One Crazy Love Story

Disclaimer: This post has three beginnings, because sometimes I have too much to say for just one. I've numbered them for your reading convenience.

1) First of all, I'm guest-posting today over at Narragansett No. 7, which is easily one of my all-time favorite blogs. Go over and check it out, bu more importantly, check out No. 7's blog. She's a talented writer, and everything she posts is engaging and interesting. Love her! Okay, back to our regularly scheduled post...


2) I met my husband online. This is no secret to some of you, as I've made it no secret. When Jeremy and I first got together, I thought it was something to be ashamed of, something to hide from people. How desperate must I seem to people that I had to meet my future husband online? What I couldn't find someone in my own neck of the woods, so I had to search the world wide interwebs to find a man from the other side of the country? Well, yes and no. Because there simply wasn't a man in Georgia that was right for me, and I know this for certain and without a doubt, because Jeremy is the man for me. He's my soul mate and other half and all of those other awful cliches.He doesn't complete me, because I complete myself, but he certainly compliments me. And I compliment him. I guess you could say we were just meant to be.

And I think our's is a story worth sharing, so here goes nothing:

3) The insomnia wasn’t unusual for a twenty-something college student, nor was the vegging out in front of the television as a means to cure that insomnia. What was unusual was the fact that I was watching a Japanese animated movie dubbed into English and becoming so riveted by it that the mere coincidental channel-surfing stumble upon the movie would become a fuel to a very obsessive fire that would lead me to my future husband. 

The next morning I fatefully hopped online and googled the word “anime.” Thousands of websites were the answer to my query, websites that I, cool college student that I was, would have laughed at only a day ago. In high school the kids who liked the phenomenon known as anime would have been on the fringe of my friends list. A level down from the book-worm/loner/nerd that I was, these kids would have probably been my friends if they hadn’t been quite so obsessed with this foreign (in more ways than one) medium. And now I was one of those kids. 

To narrow my search, I decided that I would feed my hopeless and passionate soul and add the word “romance” to the google bar; after all, a good portion of anime movies and television shows are über violent or center around a “mecha” theme. Neither genre was my cup of tea.

The website that I finally settled on wasn’t on the first few pages of the search results. No, a less popular result, it was nestled among hundreds of contrived “fan” sites and broken links. In fact, I was almost to the point where my futile and tiring research was going to put out that obsessive fire that had spread so quickly.

The title “Cult of the Romance Junkies” was different, refreshing. Cult? Yeah, I could probably get behind a cult. Junkie? With my addictive personality, it was almost like calling a spade a spade. The “Cult” was actually a community which shared reviews, commentary, and just basic conversation on a group of well-organized message boards. The community consisted mainly of females, although there were a few guys present. Guys, which I initially assumed, were either gay or perverts considering the medium of the forums. Nevertheless, his name seemed to strike out at me immediately. His posts were thought-provoking, intelligently-written, and witty

I joined the forum and, awkwardly, began trying to join in on conversations, especially the ones in which he took interest. I tried to use my own wit and intellect to gain his attention. It didn’t take long for me to become a part of the community. Within a week, I was an active member of the Cult. I participated as much as possible on the message boards, and by and by, he and I started interacting a little. It was usually in passing. He would respond to one of my comments, or vice versa. My attraction and like for him only grew.

One night, a couple of weeks after I’d joined the forum, I was invited to participate in the Internet Relay Chat (IRC) that was the main means of interaction for die-hard Cult members. He was among those die-hard members. The first night that I logged in was the first time we talked privately. The chat room had a private chat, and he private messaged me to help me learn how to use the chat. I like to say now that it was love at first type. As the days passed, we talked privately more and more. I learned that we were more alike than I could have ever imagined. We loved the same books, the same movies, had the same thoughts about the future. We began to talk on the phone as well. Our conversations lasted long into the night for me…and the early evening for him. Thus, the conflict of our relationship arose. We lived on opposite sides of the country. 

At first this was only a minor inconvenience. Our friendship would never leave the bounds of the internet or telephone. So what? I was just glad to have met a person with whom I could truly be myself. This frame of mind didn’t last long. Our connection was obviously more than just an intellectual or an emotional connection; it became obvious that this guy was the guy. He was my guy. The clichéd “one” I had always read and heard so much about, dreamed of, but never imagined that I’d meet…especially over the internet.

We hadn’t sought each other out. We hadn’t logged into a dating site, sharing our profiles, hoping that an advertisement would effectively share who we were and would just as effectively attract who we were supposed to be with. No, I never had the guts to put myself out there like that. And yet, here I was falling in love with a person I’d never properly met, never even seen face-to-face, just as if I had tried to find him. There he was.

The barrier of the distance between us was easy to overcome in his eyes. He would just move to Georgia. From his tiny town in Northern California, he would pack up all of his belongings, kiss his mom goodbye, and be on his merry way. This wasn’t as easy of a decision for me. I was a sheltered young woman. Not in the traditional sense, I mean I knew the ways of the world, but I had rarely ever traveled out of state. I was a homebody who had rarely dated; I preferred the company of my family and of my horses and cats to that of friends and people outside of my nice little comfort zone. I had been a joy to my parents, worrying them very little and always being a “good” daughter. And now I was going to move in with a guy whom I’d never met? Now I was going to shack up with a virtual stranger? This wasn’t easy for anyone in my peripheral to come to terms with, least of all me.

Yet, despite my online relationship being so out-of-character and conflicting, nothing had ever felt quite so right. I’m still not quite sure how the logistics worked out. Time passed so quickly during those few months. We maintained our online relationship and talked every day, using every medium available to us: chat rooms, instant messaging, text messaging, email, and of course, the telephone. Looking back on it now, I wish I had saved some of those conversations. That’s what’s so great about the internet you can always save your memories, copy and paste them into a digital scrap book and keep them forever. At the time, however, I had no idea what those words we shared so early on in our relationship would mean to me now.

I met my husband online in September 2006. He moved across the country, driving 2,829 miles to reach me—a girl he’d never laid eyes on—in December 2006. We married less than a year later in October. A socially-awkward Southern girl and a sensitive, smart Northern California boy. Somehow we were perfect for each other, and yet, if we had been born in any other era, we may have never found each other. We have the internet to thank for that. A technology that we take for granted in these high-speed times but one that can help cross continents and bring soul mates together.

Me and Jeremy in Spring 2007
Hope you enjoyed our crazy little love story. Speaking of Jeremy, he loves to write nearly as much as I do and has his own blog called Unexcused Absence. It's about writing, or the lack thereof. Be sure to check him out. He's a pretty clever least I think so :)

How did you meet your significant other? 

For more great love stories, check out The Lightning and the Lightning Bug:



  1. Aww, that's so sweet! My sister met her husband online. They started chatting online in August '10, met in October '10 and got married April '11. And they were oceans apart. True love prevails :)

    I met my husband while we were both dating other people. 6 months after that, we reconnected as friends and it just started from there. That was 7 years ago.

  2. Ahhh, the days of IRC and Private Chat

    Great story Katie, just love it!

    Grew up knowing my hubs from when we were kids. Romance (for lack of a better word) blossomed suddenly when I went shopping for a Corvette in 1967...John came along as an advisor. I ended up with a 66' G.T.O. and him; we married three years later.

    It's been an uphill/downhill ride ever since but, it's been ours, no one else's. Wish I still had that car....:(((((


  3. Aww, love at first type! So cute :)

    I met my hubs on I like to say that He Found Me (I had settings that would have prevented him from showing up in my Pick Out A Husband searches).

    I quickly got over the weirdness of meeting someone online. Love has no rules!

  4. I told the hubs about you two talking on IRC and we both had a good chuckle. That is how we first started talking on line as well. That was a good chat program. I love your story. I have been waiting for you to talk about this for a while.

    We meet online as well. (Perhaps there should be a support group for bloggers who meet their S/O online?)

    I was in a chat room and was talking a a guy in Montana. He wanted me to talk to his friend. We chatted online and on the phone. One day, I don't recommend this, I flew to Montana to meet him. (Adult disclaimer: For you young girls reading this, it was dumb of me to do that without having him checked out.) Anyway, we had a good time and I went back out again. Then we stopped talking.

    Fast forward 11 years later, I got a wild hair to move from MN to MT. I had NO intention of hooking up with him. Just thought he could tell me a good part of town to live in where I wouldn't be killed. We started hanging out and after me living her for 5 or 6 years we got married last year.

  5. What a great story!! I know a few other's who met online and I don't think it's that big a deal. I do remember when Online Dating was kind of a scandal though!

  6. <3 it!! what a great love story!!

  7. Sigh...I love the universe and its magical ways.

  8. Cute story. No, beautiful story...I LOVE IT!

    I met the Man at IHOP one night. I asked him out via note on a napkin. He turned me down. A year later at Happy Thursday Drinking Night at Bill's aka "Karaoke", he asked me out. I said yes, thinking "great! free dinner!"

    That was 10 years and three days ago.

  9. I met my husband online too. It was via a dating site, but we can't remember who cantacted who first and I guess it doesn't really matter. it was easier for us because we lived in the same city.

    We chatted online for a while, graduated to phone calls and then he took me out, got me horribly drunk and the rest is history. Well, not really, I'm not sure we knew at the start just how wonderful it was going to be, but it has certainly turned out that way. We met 6 years ago and have now been married for 3 years.
    My friends who have met partners through more conventional means don't understand, but I don't see it as any diffrent as meeting people in bars etc. All ways have the same possibilities!

  10. As usual, I was engrossed the whole time. Fantastic, amazing story, Katie!

    Tommy and I met in college....and although we did get to travel all over Europe together when we were 19, it's not the incredible, meant-to-be story that you guys share.


  11. I love this Katie!!! So cute, and you told it perfectly. I think it is a really sweet story. Modern day romance indeed. :)


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